behind every man’s success
is a woman
who he grew inside
who brought him up
who taught him true love
who educated him
who nurtured him
who married him, faults and all
who grew his children for him
who stood up to him
who pushed him harder
who challenged him
who was his teammate
who was everything
who is everything
– and he owes her everything
you tell me
tell you the autumn on your tongue
could be a metaphor for the way it falls
into my sticky mouth
your skin is a language
it is dark and black and lovely
you give me up, you tell me you want love
and you say it’s something to glue
to the edges of my smile
you’re a chew toy on the end of a man
that’s all i am
that’s all you are, embrace
shake this flu off you, wear fur, it’s cold don’t you know
you tell me
tell you that the end of summer
is blinded by sadness
the first dark hour is your first night as a whore
i sold you to the moon
i sold you to another man
give me your word you won’t do it again
give me your word you won’t cry when i do.
the point is not whether he
regrets leaving you
still loves you
wants you back
wishes he’d tried
the point is whether you really care or not
– and you never did
you were on top and he said,
“you’re bleeding quite badly now”.
you had to make sure you were bleeding.
so he’d believe you were a virgin.
you were fresh ceramic
then you were cracked plates, dirty commodities.
it’s a pain you can write out,
you scratch and it’s under your fingernails.
you were only a young teenager when you slept with him.
and people don’t think that’s abnormal anymore.
you are married 30 years down the line,
you look at him and you know he’s misplaced your lungs on purpose.
tucked your heart down the sofa.
put his wedding ring in the dishwasher.
and you look into his eyes
and all you can see is the reflection of his phone in them.
telling a girl when you’ll be out.
when she can lie on your side of the bed.
when she can invite her lips to sip from your coffee mug.
y’see to a lot of men,
you’re just a thing,
and commodities, more often than not,
go out of style when a new one comes along.
and having your heart broken
is a beautiful thing
my god, how lovely it is to feel the pain
when the one we thought would grow us
cut us down.
– you grew anyway
if you come from two different worlds
you are the luckiest
no person can be more educated
than the one
who was never accepted in any society
– dual identity
the reflection in a mirror
is so temperamental
you should really rely on what you can’t see first
– look deep inside
you were the wave that threw him across the world
strange and terrifying.
one day he’d had enough of you.
enough of your risks
enough of your bruises
enough of your breaking
you were a horrific fate.
look at him now,
still searching for you in every girl he meets.
– of course you changed him forever