everything stinks of you
when my mother was hungry or something she’d jokingly say “I am not to be trifled with” well I’m hungry for the love in your blood — and I’m not joking
I’d go back to my ex but he’s boring and you’re cooler but he’s coolest and it’s all switched like dodgy electricians fucking your house up — you still pay though
when I learn about water potential it never sticks and school has an adverse effect on me I just want to be water I’m looking for people like water — join me
if your name is water let me look through you and tell you that your fluidity has had an effect on how I look at things — — people, even
because when the night shrouds myself and my heart and my soul and all I want to do is revisit streets littered in poverty — I remember what people like you said
that poverty is just those that didn’t suffer a single problem, and those that aren’t loved by anything but their Gucci, and gold becomes their Earth — I agree
the strawberry of your heart the blueberries in your eyes I’m glad you’ve trusted me to not crush and blend them but I probably will — I’m sorry I guess
some women would say it’s their nature but I have an aptitude for making guys completely overwrought when dating me and it’s saddening — but hilarious
I mean I was always a bitch when I said that Catherine’s septum’s about to fall out any day now, I’ve done coke too, and my soul’s hallucinating — funny
I’ve got this inquisitorial speech that I want to show you, it’s all rhetoric and nonsensical — guess it matches this Alice in Wonderland persona I’ve got
there’s mirrors spattered in all the punctuation and subtext but please don’t study it like GCSE English, my words aren’t to be tested — hahahaha
often thought about narcissus and his case,
often it’s the same with me looking into you if you understand this then you’ll have a better insight — sadly
into me.
These orange blossoms that fall to kiss my face
are intertwined within the plaits of my hair
and the smell of banana conditioner I used glowed
from the strands, the one I used in summer
It’s not about being single
but here in my chest whilst I reminisce
The rain spits in my face and the smell of cigarettes
and smoke is stained within the fabric of my skin my hair is dampened and licked
with the humidity and it smells of nothing, nothing at all.
© Lydia Hounat 2014
oh they don’t know how I lick these leaves
these leaves on willow trees
I’m blowin holes outta the smoke these trees
they’re made to tease
that’s why im an Islamic convert just tryna please
these calla lilies
someone stitched my eyes cross-eyed
someone askin how’d your skin get so white
truth is, this is me sun burnt, this is skin cancer when
it’s livin off microwave meals and cunnilingus
I went to the park hopin I’d be more clean
the natural whites of my nails seem to say Im mean
like girls who’ve got French manicures
this new guy with the johnny depp bravado
studded with goatee fresher than james franco
hottest thing I’ve seen to date, I would date,
he is not my mate
he looks like ibuprofen when it’s hot pink and brilliant
the pills you wanna take to stop feeling the kicks
from your period
oh they don’t know how I lick these leaves
these pills are better than me, how I’d stain a square tab on my tongue, tattoo on me
on judgement day they’d say
swallow me.
© Lydia Hounat 2014
